If this is to end in fire, then we should all burn together.

This month has given me so many new experiences and lessons- learnt the harder way, nonetheless, eye-openers. I haven't had time to catch my breath, and am still reeling in the daze of its aftershocks. 

***

On 1st March I attended my first concert. It was the first time Ed Sheeran came to India and I just could not pass up the opportunity (If you don't know who Ed is, click here ) 

That day was the first time in a very long time that I felt like a real teenager. A rebel, perhaps? I have always been an old soul, and I'd prefer staying in my PJs all day and read or watch tv shows, if I could. But of course the fact that I'm giving my A-levels this year, doesn't give me much time to do that. 

So coming back to the point, I don't go to clubs and get drunk off my ass at every chance I could get. This concert seemed like a rite of passage to becoming a normal urban teenager. I am a homebody. I prefer my books and fictional characters to people. So when I was suddenly pushed into an arena with about three thousand other people approximately my age, barely clothed, girls with their faces caked with makeup and guys with that ridiculous near-Mohawk, I was a little skeptical about the future of the world. With the risk of sounding like my grandpa, if this is the state of today's generation I really don't look forward to the world where our fate lies in the hands of these high, drunk, scarcely clothed animals. But looking at the condition of the world right now, I do not think it would make much of a difference anyway ( I mean, a ban on beef? What is up with you Maharashtra! Be practical and get your shit together, government.)

Once Ed came onstage it was a completely different atmosphere. A different vibe altogether. All of us from different nooks and crannies of Mumbai, were united and equally captured in this one emotion- admiration and maybe even love for this gentle, lovely voice. The whole crowd started belting out the lyrics together. It was beautiful. Mesmerizing. I was so overwhelmed.

This had to be the highlight. Almost surreal.

Another highlight of this month was this assignment I was given by my coordinator at school. I was to teach physics to 9th graders, as a part of an experiment. I was a little apprehensive about it because I can't particularly boast about my people skills. I'm an awkward potato, and what if I make a fool out of myself? I don't think I can handle getting ridiculed by a bunch of fourteen year olds. I'll die of embarrassment. Reluctantly, I agreed to it.

I was given the outline of the lesson and a worksheet to get done in class, and was told that I'll be teaching after a week. But when my coordinator cornered me three days later and asked if I could conduct my class that day, I was dumbfounded. My palms started sweating and my chest felt hollow. The lesson was no problem, but I have no idea what to do. How should I behave? How should I treat them? Why me? ugh.

So I just played it cool. Told myself it was just like teaching my brother. I brought in examples of X-men and Zindagi na Milegi Dobara to clear concepts of falling bodies and terminal velocity. Taught them tricks to find the slope of a graph. Allowed them to have wrestling matches to explain forces and their effects. Time flew by and it was already the end of class. By the time I packed up, I had kids coming to me and telling me how 'cool' a teacher I was and asking me if I would replace their actual teacher. I couldn't stop laughing, that had to be the greatest compliment I could have received and I had a goofy smile on my face for the rest of the day.

I taught the class for two days, and by the time I was done there was a heavy weight on my chest. I never thought I'd enjoy teaching so much, the moment when the understanding dawns in the kid was my favorite. It was so rewarding. I really had this connection with those kids. I'm going to miss those two days.

***

Zayn Malik left One Direction. I never saw this coming. I really wanted to see all five of them perform together live one day. Guess that's never happening.

***

That's all from my side. I now have a bunch of  submissions and textbooks calling my name :(
Ciao.

Of all the things I remember, summer has never looked the same.

I watched as cars passed by in flashes. A drift of wind blew and I took a deep breath in. The air faintly smelled of burnt grass. The darkness on either side of the road left the actual landscape to imagination. The immense emptiness. Our car had broken down, and we were awaiting the mechanic. Normally I would've been irritated, but I was not. There was something weird about the happy streak I have been on lately. And I'm not complaining.

I started walking along the fringes of the highway while the grown ups dealt with the situation, drowning in thoughts about school, and how everything was coming to an end. Finality of the situation pleased me. I have craved freedom ever since I can remember. New beginnings lie ahead of me-I couldn't have been happier.

Goosebumps rose on my neck and I could feel a pair of arms snake around my waist, and all of a sudden those arms started tickling me. I squealed, causing him to burst into an endless bout of laughter. I rolled my eyes at him.
"Why so serious?" he said, impeccably imitating Heath Ledger's accent, and succeeding in making me join him. That's what he always does: makes me happy whenever he's around me, and there are very few people in this world who actually succeed in doing so.

Meeting him for the first time in ten years two days ago, I never thought we could be so close so fast. I am socially awkward, but somehow there was no such awkwardness with him. In the beginning, being in the same 'rebellious teen' phase of life got us talking. Things and situations we could relate to, and in no time we were spilling our deepest secrets. We talked about everything and nothing at the same time. It was as if those ten years had never passed.

It was as if when he hugged me tight, he finally put all pieces of me together, as cheesy as it sounds. I thought I was okay before. That, that was who I am. No more a single glass, but a constellation. Beyond repair. But that one week with him, transformed me into something new and wondrous.

And that night, on that desolated highway in the middle of Karnataka, I knew I was going to be fine, happy even. He did not change me. I'd like to think that meeting him, made me evolve to a better person.

Boy you got my heartbeat runnin' away Beating like a drum and it's coming your way Can't you hear that boom, badoom, boom bass?

I have totally lost it. See that *points to the title* right there.
CIE is ruthless. All those who think international boards are easy, go take a walk.

-Coming to the point,

HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY TO MY BLOGGGG!
I'm am so excited. It has been one helluva year.
I write-I disappear-I reappear-I write. Its been a vicious circle, but man have I loved being here.
A big shoutout to all those jolly good fellas who've been with me all along. Looovve youu guyyys <3 x I really appreciate ya'll sticking around.
Zero to thirty- something followers and two blog awards along, I have come a long way. I never expected my little dumpyard to become something like this. And something tells me this is just the beginning.
I just wish I could revel this moment, but sadly I can't. I'm in the middle of my grade 10 board exams which get over on the 19th of next month so the next biiiig post on the 20th, seeing that I'll be partying my wits off on the 19th :P
I should go now.

Truck loads of love,
Yours truly.

My knight in shining armor.

The street was dark. Dogs howling in the distance. Long shadows cast by trees making the road unnecessarily spooky. Half the street lights weren't on, and the one that was, was constantly flickering.

 The road isn't usually that dark, but the current strike of retailers, protesting against unnecessary taxes by keeping their stores shut, made the road so.

 I was on my way home, from class. And I usually have a friend with me, but he had to stay back for a punishment. So I was on my own.

At times like these I missed Ted.

Cursing at my luck and clenching my bag, I increased my pace and looked around.
 Just a guy, about a couple of feet behind me. Other than that, the road was devoid of humans. So practically, screaming my lungs out would not work.
I suddenly thought of the pepper-spray that my mum had bought me (more like forced on to me), fished out my cellphone and kept a steady finger on the speed-dial button, and started jogging.

Just as I rounded a curve, I bumped into something and my cellphone fell outta my hand.

As I bent to pick it up, I looked up. And found that it was a "somebody" that I had dashed into.

Quick to mutter an apology, I looked up to find that gorgeous face curved up, smiling down at me.
"Aaron! You scared the living hell outta me." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"Well, hello to you too. Why were you running? "
"Umm..just like that? " Damn. Good job with the response, tongue.

"Where were you going?"
"Home?" It came out more like a question. Argh.

"I'll walk you."
"No, no. Its alright. I can manage."
"Nah. I insist, ok? " Ok? I was more than okay with it. More like giddy with excitement.

And we walked up to my apartment. All the way making me jealous, by going on and on about the Swedish House Mafia concert in Mumbai that was a part of their last tour as a band, that he went to.. teachers, Blackberry, snakeskin, Ann and Computers, which he was a world topper in. That genius!

And as we neared my building, I said goodbye.
I stayed back for a moment, stared at his lean figure walking down the footpath. His grey sweatshirt illuminated by the yellow street lights.

All he did was to walk me home. But with that little act of care, he was my savior. My knight in shining armor.

PS: This was posted a little earlier in the day, but there was some techie error. So, I posted it again:)

Of good times and noodle salad.

She let out a shiver as she stepped into the cool Manchester air and walked towards the building.
She felt a wave of exertion overwhelm her as she stepped into the elevator, and let out a sigh.
She struggled to retrieve the keys from her purse, and her laptop bag fell at her feet. After a few tries, the door finally gave way and she stumbled into her apartment. And all of a sudden she was engulfed by a smell. Good heavens.

Masala chai.

It was as if she was magically transported back Home. Mumbai.
She was suddenly seventeen again, and could hear the rain pelting outside her window.
The smell of the wet soil.
The sudden pleasant weather welcome, after months of scorching heat.
She remembered that day distinctly.

First rain of the season. She was at home in front of her books, and was caught in a sudden trance as she heard the droplets pitter - patter on her windowsill.
The ring of her cell phone suddenly cut through the still air ; it was him.

Come down quickly- He had said, leaving no room for argument. She didn't need to be told twice.

There he was, outside the gate on his bike. Fully drenched.
The rain had stopped now. It was more beautiful.
She ran to him, ready to rebuke with all guns blazing. But he had waved her off, and given her a hand to help her get on the bike. He gave her some crap about being back in Mumbai after a long time and called her  paranoid after he sneezed a couple of times.

She would never forget that day.
She would never forget that ride.
She would never forget the lush greens and the whispering winds.
She would never forget the feel of the cool air hitting her face as he cut through the lanes skillfully.
She would never forget the quaint tea stall and the smell of masala chai.
She would never forget his mood that day.
She would never forget the twinkle of mischief in his eye.
She would never forget what he said to her.
She could not get herself to forget the way he met his death, the very next day.


Her mum waving her hand in her face, brought her back to the present.
"Earth to Savi." she said.

She found a tear escaping her eye. Just the whiff of masala chai had provoked memories she had tried so hard to bury and leave behind her, to surface.

She ran to her and consumed her in a bear hug and held her for a moment. She was thankful that her mum was finally there.
She had never been that close to her; once a daddy's girl, always a daddy's girl.
But at that moment she was the one who quenched her thirst for something familiar in an unfamiliar city. She enveloped her with the warmth, she didn't know she was aching for. She reminded her of home. Mumbai.

She was her home, away from home.

Picture courtesy : Weheartit  <3

You and me? We were meant to be.

He just stared at her. Watching her frantically try to lap up water from the bowl in front of her, but failing miserably.

He looked straight ahead, with a piercing look. 

"Cindy has rabies. Its the last stage. Take her to the Parel veterinary hospital, and admit her immediately."

A tear rolled down my cheek.

All her life, this German Shepherd had been treated royally. She was more of a daughter to my parents, than I ever was. She was that one link, that brought us all together.

My mum always said that she had three children - Cindy, My brother and I.

It all started the previous night. After dinner she had been given her treat, but surprisingly she didn't gobble it up the way she normally does. She tried real hard to bite on it, but still no luck.

The next morning when having her breakfast, it all started falling from the sides of her mouth. Her jaw just couldn't be moved.

The vet had just so easily stamped her as a case of rabies.

As soon as my mum received the news, she broke down. My dad, was still not convinced.
They drove across the city, to the hospital. By now, my mother was into the possessive-mother-lioness mode.
There was no way Cindy could have had rabies. She was vaccinated and always walked by my parents, or me. And we took utmost care.
It took a lot to convince the people at the hospital otherwise. Mum plainly refused for Cindy to be kept in the Rabies Ward. It was no ward; just a fenced area without a cover for the dogs left to die, in the scorching heat.

I sat in front of her kennel at home. And cried. Cried my heart out. Cried until my crying became more like a questioning session with God.

I woke up, to find myself on my bed. I shut my eyes tightly. I didn't want to get up.
I could hear voices outside, confirming that it wasn't just a bad dream.

That was the first time I heard my father cry.

I clutched onto my pillow and suddenly there was darkness all around me.

Those two days were the worst days of my life.
It was as if my whole world had crashed, in just a day.

The doctors and ward boys refused to touch her.
But my parents never lost hope. Day in and day out, they travelled all the way to the hospital taking liquid meals with them, and force-feeding her. Not once letting the thought of her dying, let them do otherwise.

A couple of days passed. This feeding routine of my parents' went on. Her bark had changed. Her eyes had supposedly changed colour. The signs were all there.

I not once went to see her at the hospital. My life had come to a standstill.
I didn't know what I was doing. I lost appetite. I didn't feel like talking. I found myself staring into empty space, thinking about nothing.

After my parents' gazillion talks with the doctors and convincing theories, they decided to give her an ultimatum. If she survives the next week, they would be ready to take her on the table and examine her.

And my baby made it!

In the park. One year ago.

More recent. On the verandah of our home.

Her favourite pastime- Gossiping with the sparrows.

***

This happened on 20th November,2012. Cindy is perfectly awesome now :)

She lived through the week, and proved the absence of the rabies virus.

The X-rays showed a bone stuck in her throat, locking her jaw, that prevented food from going down her throat. And the difference in her bark was due to lack of water. The change in eye-color was pure BS.

She did not have rabies!

That week, was the worst one of my life.


Rabies is a virus that can be spread by the saliva of mammals. So, thats why if you have a rabies infected animal's saliva penetrating into your skin, through an open wound you should consult your family physician ASAP.

The signs of rabies in dogs, don't appear until 15 days.

Rabies has three stages. There are vaccines available. The final stage, is a death sentence.

What I learnt from the experience : India is in dire need of well educated and qualified, honest veterinarians.
Source: Worth-less blabbering veterinarian idiots.

I'm addicted to you. Don't you know that you're toxic?

"Come home na, we'll study together! " said she.

We were both taking a test the next day and I was a bit skeptical about the study together thing, thanks to my great results the previous term. *note sarcasm* I desperately wanted a better score, and she was no good in it either, but somehow I convinced my mum to let us study together. I had already cancelled on her a couple of times in the past, but there was no getting out of it this time.

I walked to the beat of Titanium, as I made my way to her apartment. I jogged to the first floor, and knocked on the door. In about a minute she stood in front of me, flashing me her crooked smile. I smiled back, out of courtesy as she grabbed my hand and pulled me in.

I took a minute to take in my surroundings. It was a small apartment-a 1 BHK. We were the only ones in there. To say it was messy, would be an understatement. There lay books and papers on every surface. Ironed clothes in a pile, on a nearby settee. And a huge cluster of designer shoes near the door. The flat-screen TV and the iPhone on the pile of newspapers, being the only indicators of the money running through the family. I suddenly felt claustrophobic and suffocated. The apartment could seriously use some aeration.

She swiftly picked up her bag and pile of notebooks from the makeshift couch, and motioned for me to sit on it. I did the same, and pulled out my textbook. We quickly started working through our portion.

Once we were about half-way through the lesson, there was a banging on the door. I was startled. She quickly got up and opened it.
"ANNNUUU!!(name changed, duh.) You would not believe what happened!!! Oh, you have a guest." That was all I heard, before this guy just turned away and ran down the stairs.

" Arrey Aaron(name changed, again.)." She then turned to me. "You don't mind him smoking, do you?"

"No, no. No probs." I replied, still looking in my book. No matter how casually she took the test, I was serious about it and certainly wanted good grades this time.

"Aaaaron. She dosent have a problem with smokers!" She yelled at him.

I suddenly looked up to see this eighteen-ish guy in a navy-blue over-sized tee and black shorts enter the living room, with a phone held to his ear, a ciggy and a bag in his other hand. I was left gaping.
 He was gorgeous.

If you looked closely, you could see the semblance. He looked like a thinner, male version of her.

He turned to me instantly, and probably caught me oogling. "Please excuse my language for the next 180 seconds."

He turned to Anu and narrated this story, full of profanities describing the extremity of the situation. How his driver got a spasm in the middle of the road, and how he wandered to find help, and in due course met this adorable cocker spaniel, and almost stepped on a snake shedding its skin, all this while his dark- brown eyes twinkling with excitement. Anu seemed to take it all in with a matched level of curiosity.

I was just left staring at this exchange between the siblings. He started telling her every thing that happened to him, and she had equal interest in his rantings. They both had this air around them that I hardly wanted to disturb, you know. It just makes you want to look and laugh at. They were so at ease with each other. They both included me in the conversation at times, but then I was just content with sitting back and watching them!

After a while, he left the room.
"You guys are so adorable together! " I said to her.
"Oh, no. He's a prick." I laughed.

She then went on to tell me the story behind "them". About how her father left her mother, and how she went on to make a career for herself. And, how Aaron was always there for her in all aspects.
This made my respect for them grow. I mean, isn't that how a family should be?

They say, "When all else fails, there's family." This is how it is. They are each-other's family.
Circumstances bring people together, and make a better person out of them.
The camaraderie, the little sarcastic exchanges, the promises to keep secrets intact, the little surprises, that emotional blackmailing. Its all a part of the package!
Im glad I got to experience that through Aaron and Anu, and my own brother. And, would wish for everyone to experience that atleast once in their lifetime.

My brush with History.

Visits to Dadar are always special. Is it the special Parsi - Marathi feel to it? Or the fact that my parents practically grew there? Or the feel of walking through history? I will never know.
Every city has its past. Its secrets, which are now being buried deep by the layers of modernization being forced onto it.
Every heroic city has its story.
Dadar is that part of Mumbai which housed many of the city's historic events.
The hub of all activities in the Victorian Era, it still does not fail to impress outsiders with its charm. It has this inept ability to capture any passerby's attention. Every time I pass the area, I feel as if Im magically transported back to when India was under the British Raj and half expect horse-carriages with counts in their beautiful attire with that air of hostility on their way to yet another important meet.
The Parsi tea-shops are a common feature, highlighted in many of those movies. A typical old pot-bellied owner with his trademark white cap, black glasses and white khaccha getting all cranky over those good-for-nothing collegians who keep hanging out in that tiny shop of his, drinking milky-chai and eating maska pav.
The long Shivaji Park, where my grandfather used to take me for walks, long long ago. Where you are bound to find the freshest young cricket talent, and perhaps also the next Sachin Tendulkar! Well it was Sachin's homeground!
The nearby beach gives the place a whole different outlook. Cool drifts of wind kept those hot summer afternoons pleasant, kept those trees swaying back and forth.
The area being the best shopping area for festivals. Anything, like any of the rare-est item, can be found here!
And speaking of festivals, the Ganesh Chaturthi period, here being a fortnight-long celebration, second to none!  Almost every other house here, houses a Ganesh idol and worships it for a certain time. And the visarjan days are the ones when everybody is out on their verandahs looking for a glimpse of the varied sizes of idols making their way towards immersion. Huge Sarvajanik Ganpati idols and small nuclear-family idols alike. The chants of Ganpati leaving and coming back the next year ring throughout the city and mark the optimism of the city dwellers.

And just as another bull-dozer knocks off yet another worn down structure of the area, bit by bit our heritage is being wiped out, leaving behind nothing more than a few smudges on the city's skyline. I pity the generations to come.


Later.
xx

You hold me, Im alive. We're like diamonds in the sky.

Bubbles are such pretty, fascinating things.

The precise spherical shape, the incredibly fragile nature of the microscopically thin soap film, the beautiful colours that swirl and shimmer.

They are beautiful. And photogenic. They bring happiness and peace to me.

Later, folks. 

:) xx

Picture courtesy: Weheartit

I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet. You shoot me down, but I get up.

Im happy now.

Happy.

I have started smiling more. I feel content.

So, for the past week or so my cell phone has been switched off, and I have not gone crazy yet. That, is a good thing.

I have started getting up early and going to bed early. As, promised to Pop.

I have taken up running again. And, clicking photos on my way back! My Instagram account is now, thus more active.

I'm able to concentrate more, and seem to space out less.

I'm never bored. If I fall short of things to do, I sit on the window and observe.

I've started writing, as in real stuff.
I ditched three parties.

I've started bonding with Cindy, again. My German shepherd. She listens to me, without interrupting or judging me. And, she talks to me.

I touched my easel and paints after two whole years. Only touched.

And, deactivated my Facebook account. Confessions Confessions Confessions.

Started listening to The Script. They make me happy.

Carry a book everywhere I go. 

So, Im happy now.

My birthday's in two months, and I've told my mum not to buy me anything. And, give all the money she was gonna spend on a party, gift, clothes etcetera for me, to me. Im just gonna go to Crossword one day, and spend it all. 

Pre-boards in less than a month. And, Im suprisingly still okay, with this happy attitude and all. Not hyper-active, nor stressed out. No signs of freaking out either. 

And, Mo keep's me busy with his stories and problems. I call them- The Singapore Times. We Skype almost everyday.

So, life's good.

The struggles Im facing,

The chances Im taking,

Sometimes might knock me down.

But, no. Im not breaking.

I may not know it,

But these are the moments that

Im gonna remember most, yeah.

I just gotta keep goin.

That awkward moment, when you relate to a Miley Cyrus-song.  :|

Anyways,

Ciao for now. (: xx

Picture coutesy : WeHeartIt.com